that's an acceptable place to lick
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
