Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
