i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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