My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
My life is pants optional.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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