when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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