If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
