You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
