I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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