Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
