I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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