Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize