so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
How naked do you want me to be?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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