He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
