You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
worst night to have a conscience
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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