I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
areolas are like halos for boobs.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
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