Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
