So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
You made out with two different species that night
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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