I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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