The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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