Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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