love makes seman taste better
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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