so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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