Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Drunk is not a location!
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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