That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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