She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize