She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
