2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
