My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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