I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
