I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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