3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
