worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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