Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
