I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
