hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
