dude i'm inner monologue high
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
