I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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