I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
