when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
