I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Please don't give away my fajitas
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