I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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