flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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