I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
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