clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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