I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
