She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
