nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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