we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Randomize
