if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Randomize
