I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
